Duke Nukem 64

Developer: 3D Realms (Original) Eurocom (Port) Publisher: GT Interactive

Released: November 16, 1997 Rated: M 7/10

It’s no secret in this particular case: on the N64, you are getting what most would consider to be the kid-gloves version of a classic ‘90s FPS. Duke Nukem 3D released in Spring 1996 as one of two sequels to the original side-scrolling Duke Nukem from Apogee Software, later known as 3D Realms. While Duke Nukem II largely built on the original’s style as a side-scrolling run ‘n’ gun, 3D would essentially put the company’s Build engine on the map alongside Shadow Warrior and Blood. And as a smash success and purported “Doom Killer,” 3D would find a home on all three major home consoles of the time, even if it meant being one of, if not the last victims of overcensorship for the audience on a Nintendo system.

“Sir, it’s a felony to tease the order box.”

The good news is that if a game’s level of raunchiness isn’t all that important to your enjoyment of it, then Duke Nukem 64 is as viable a way to play it as any other home port of the time. It doesn’t take any major graphical, feature, or gameplay concessions to get this game running, and thanks to the likes of several N64 releases from major franchises, such as Doom, Hexen, and Quake, FPS fans should be plenty familiar with the N64 controller by the time they slip into Duke’s combat boots. All of the original levels are present here, albeit modified to suit the hardware à la Quake 64, and are played through in one complete sequence rather than divided into episodes. And while this would be no different from any other port of Duke 3D or a game like Doom, this does of course exclude the original’s numerous expansions and custom levels.

“Everything’s ‘freakin” with this guy, he can’t say the word f—- oh wait, Nintendo.”

It’s for reasons like this, though, that we should naturally be comparing Duke Nukem 64’s to other ports and not to the PC original or something like the 20th Anniversary Remake edition. We are, of course, looking at a more heavily edited version, but still getting one that holds up as a way to play an excellent boomer shooter. Small changes like redrawn weapon sprites, re-recorded voice lines (still done by original voice actor John St. John), and changing babe interaction to saving them from alien cocoons as part of 100%ing each level don’t interfere with the downright fun gunplay, the classic level exploration, or the guns blazing approach to every encounter. This is good old Build engine fun that can scratch that itch just fine. And with splitscreen multiplayer ready to go on cart, there’s even more reason to pop this in with friends and start blasting away.

Censorship doesn’t mean we can’t have a visit from ol’ Uncle Teddy

While the port does hold up graphically, though, and really, you’d be surprised to think that even after Forever, Duke himself is a fully enjoyable character that doesn’t need the “product of his time” disclaimer the way you’d imagine, the one real casualty here has to be the music. No in-game music is a real letdown and is the one true area where the hardware seems to fail the original game. It’s probably the only thing that’s going to take you out of the headspace you start out with as you blast away pig cops and assault troopers. Realizing there’s basically complete silence the first time you have to slow down and start sweeping every inch of the map for the hidden key or door to progress will kinda kill the vibe. Of course you can put on some Megadeth and match the tone yourself, but even when he calls them “alien scum” instead of “alien bastards” and gets jacked up on Vitamin X instead of steroids, not having the voiceover when appropriate would also be a shame.